God’s Plans at Allume

Over the last week I have started this post a hundred times in my head and just this morning I have started and erased it at least a dozen times.

How do I begin to share with you the incredible experience of Allume other than to say I went to Allume with a plan and God turned it upside down and showed me He had a different plan!

For months I have planned and prayed for Allume – I prayed for the many ladies seeking God’s guidance over the details of the weekend from the speakers, to the sponsors, to the menu right down to protection over their families as they followed God’s Calling on their lives.

I knew God had a plan and purpose for me being at Allume. I thought that reason was so that He could give me the opportunity to learn how to grow my blog and this platform He has given me to encourage and share His love with women across the world.

While I did learn ways to grow my blog, it wasn’t long before I realized God had a much bigger plan for me at Allume. This plan was to take me by the hand, put His arm around me and encourage my hurting, tired, weary heart.

For the last several years I have been focused on a specific prayer. This prayer has caused me to move out of my comfort zone, my life has been stretched more than I ever thought possible. Through this time I have felt God’s Presence, guidance and strength in countless ways.

But over the last few months I have become tired and weary and ready to give up. And to be completely honest I was ok with giving up. I had nothing left to give.

And then came Allume and three keynote speakers whom God used to help me see that I need to die to myself, let Him pick me back up off the side of the road and revive my dry bones.

(A little heads up…this post may get long but I will do my best to hit the highlights without getting too long winded J)

Enter in Ann Voskamp, Jennie Allen and Bianca Olthoff…

Ann Voskamp is an incredibly beautiful soul. Her book One Thousand Gifts A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are has changed my life in more ways than I can count. I am now able to thank God in the good, the bad & everywhere in between for His countless amazing gifts.

Her message Why Every Single One of God’s Children Are Stars began the realization in my heart that God had a bigger plan for Allume than just teaching me about blogging.

A few of the highlights from Ann’s message:

·      When you live for an audience of One – you always know you count.

·      Who wants the lauding of people when they have the love of the Messiah.

·      It needs to be enough to be a twinkle in my husband’s eyes.

·      Your hunger to be known is a good God given appetite for more of God.  “But the man who loves God is known by God.” 1 Corinthians 8:3. More satisfying is to be known by God!

·      My purpose is to point the way to Christ.

·      A star is born when it breaks itself and gives itself away. A star is born in me when my life breaks and I give it away to help others know Christ.

·      The brightest stars let themselves be broken into beautiful, broken as they die to self.

·      I am where I am for such a time as this – not to make an impression but to make a difference!!

And then God really sealed the deal that He had something bigger planned for me when Jennie Allen spoke. Jennie fought God as He gave her the message He wanted shared with us. She didn’t want to share it because she knew it would mean stepping on some toes but I will forever be grateful that she followed God’s leading!

I wish I had bullet points for Jennie’s message like I shared from Ann’s, but I don’t. You see I spent most of Jennie’s message in tears. The tears were because I realized God was using this weekend to “pull me up off the side of the road”.

Jennie shared from Hebrews 12:1-3 and told us a story about how God pulled her up off the side of the road as she became weary from “running a race” in her life. During those moments as we sat in the dark of the ballroom my heart broke as I realized I had given up and fallen down on the side of the road in the marathon race God has called me too.

I know Hebrews 12:1-3 and have actually prayed it over the last several years but I had taken my eyes off Jesus where this issue is concerned and in doing that I lost focus. I grew weary and dry and had given up.

Oh I am so grateful Jennie Allen obeyed God and gave the difficult message He had planned! Through her message I allowed God to pick me up, dust me off and renew the prayer and race He has called me to.

On Saturday morning God used Bianca Olthoff to complete the journey he began with Ann. Bianca is a dynamic, charismatic, on fire lady for God. And He used Bianca to breathe life into the dry bones of my life.

·      As she shared from Ezekiel 37:1-14 I began to feel the “dry bones” of my heart begin to revive and come back to life vs. 5 “The Lord and King speaks to you. He says, ‘I will put breath in you. Then you will come to life again.”

·      Let your pain have a purpose don’t let your pain shackle you.

·      The impossible is where God shows up. My heart was in the valley of dry bones. My question to myself was, “Do I believe that God can raise the dry bones again?”

·      God calls me to act and revive those around me. I must trust God to do the work He has called me to.

·      Clarity is knowing what God wants to do; Courage is believing God can do what He has called you to do.

I know this has been a lengthy, heavy post but God moved in a mighty way in my life while at Allume. And as I learned from all three of these ladies…

When God breaks my heart & my life to draw me closer to Him,

I am called to share those broken pieces with others.

It is in the sharing of those broken pieces where others are healed.

Stay tuned as I share later this week some more of my time at Allume. I promise they won’t be so heavy…in fact there may be a funny story about bathroom stalking thrown in.

In His Calm,