Recently I had a conversation with a friend who was expressing frustration over questions that have gone unanswered. She shared her discouragement and doubt over the possibility of never finding the answers. Without answers she is at a loss as to what steps to take next.
In full transparency I didn’t know what to tell my friend. The only words I knew to say were, “I’ll be praying for you. Please keep me updated on what you find out.”
As I walked away, I feared the words “I’ll be praying for you.” sounded empty and trite. While I meant every word (and truly did intended to pray for her) I didn’t know what else to say. I found myself asking the Lord, “How do I pray for her? Lord I need you to show me how to pray for my friend.”
Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? Do you promise to pray for a friend but leave wondering if that’s enough?
Galatians 6:2 tells us to “carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ”.
While I feared “I’ll be praying for you.” sounded empty and trite, it truly is the best way to carry our friend’s burdens. When we undergird them in prayer we help give them strength that is found through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Jesus specifically prayed for the disciples
In John 17:6-19 just before he was to leave the disciples, Jesus modeled how we are to pray for our friends.
I pray for them. I am not praying for the world, but for those you have given me, for they are yours.
John 17:9
What did Jesus specifically pray for the disciples?
- Protection –“…protect them by the power of our name, the name you gave me, so that they may be one as we are one.” John 17:11. “My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one.” John 17:15. Jesus loved the disciples. He desired protection for the disciples because He knew full well Satan intended to harm them.
- Sanctification – “Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth. As you sent me into the world, I have sent them into the world. For them I sanctify myself, that they too may be truly sanctified.” John 17:17-19. Jesus was sanctified: set apart for a specific purpose. His desire for the disciples was that they would be set apart from the world in order to go on mission to spread the Word of God.
How do I pray for my friends?
While it’s important to spend time specifically praying for friends’ needs, it’s also important to spend time praying for them as Jesus prayed for His disciples.
- Protection – Our friends live a daily witness to those with whom they come in contact. If the enemy can discourage them through doubt and questions their witness is affected. Like Jesus told Simon Peter in Luke 22:32, our prayer for our friends should be that their “faith may not fail” so that they will defeat the enemy’s attempt to harm their witness.
- Sanctification – When doubt and discouragement set in it’s very easy to lose focus on spending time in God’s Word. When we pray for time in God’s Word to be a priority each day, we are praying for sanctification to take place in their life.
Remember when I told you I worried my response to my friend – “I’ll be praying for you.” – sounded empty and trite? After studying Jesus’ prayer for the disciples in John 17:6-19, I realize praying for a friend is one of the most important things I can do for them. Through prayer for protection and sanctification I undergird and help give them strength through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Through your study of Jesus’ prayer for His Disciples how will you change the way you pray for your friends? I would love to hear how God is leading you to pray differently for your friends. Send me a message by clicking on the “Contact” link at the top of the page.
In His Calm,
